Alis Grave Nil

Thursday, 16 August 2012

Post Olympic Musings

So the ancient games are over and our heros can be proud of themselves for collecting so many gold medals, including Pegasus the wonder horse, who won a gold medal for horse dancing.  Apollo and Achilles are having a drink in the local taverna....

Achilles:  "So what we do now, Apollo?  Olympics is finished.  Some numpty in the archery contest busted my ankle with stray arrow.  Bloody foreigners!

Apollo:  We could hop over to beach and watch Poseiden practising synchronised swimming with the beach volley ball girls...the lucky b****do!

Achilles: Nah, he is big show off.  The girls won't look at us if he is there.  Anyway, thought it was wine o'clock?  Service very slow in this taverna. 

Apollo:  Hey, Dionysus, another large jug of wine over here, there's a good lad. 

Dionysus: What your last slave die of?

Apollo:  Single sword wound to chest, actually.

Dionysus: Okay, one jug of Ouzo coming up.

Achilles:  Fancy going for a kebab after this, Apollo?

Apollo: That sounds like just the job.  A perfect end to a perfect Olympic games.

Wednesday, 8 August 2012

A Little Olympic Musing

I know I said previously that the Printemps household would be an Olympic free zone, but I just happened to switch on the TV the other night and the men's shot put was on.  Several minutes later and I discovered that it was actually the women's shot put.  I thought that big lass from Bellarusse was a big bloke.  She flung that big heavy ball so far that it almost beheaded several spectators in the back row.  A whole section of spectators actually ran for the hills on her second attempt. 

And what about the women's judo?  I thought it was Sumo wrestling!  Honestly, how can you be fit when you weigh 20 stones? 

So how are you enjoying the Olympics, mes amis?  I'm not really into it in a big way but I'm glad to see the Brits have won so many gold medals.  Oh, and I do like the horse dancing. 

As for the badminton, what a scream!  Two teams trying their best to lose the game and playing like great big jessies.  What was that all about?    I'm sure it wasn't like that in Ancient Greece... 

"Hey, Achilles, stop messing about and play like a man."
"What you mean, Artemis?   This bloody game for women anyway.  I go watch the girls playing beach volley ball.  Have you seen Athena in a bikini?"

Have a good day, mes amis.  I'm just off to practise my shot put in the back garden.