Alis Grave Nil

Monday, 29 September 2014

Cameron's War

I have no interest in politics and I hardly watch the News now but I believe we are getting involved in a war with something called IS (Islamic State).  Is this another new made up expression designed to make us frightened enough to back yet another war in the Middle East that has fluff all to do with the UK?  We are not in danger of "psychotic terrorist" attacks in the UK, in the same way we were not in any danger of Sadam Hussain pressing a button and launching a weapon of mass destruction which Tony Bliar told us would arrive in the UK in 45 minutes.  The only psychotic terrorists we know of are sitting in a big building in Westminster giving the go-ahead for another bloody war.
I can't bring myself to post a photo of David Cameron because it just makes me want to slap his big round shiny face.
Right, got that off my chest. I'm off on my holidays soon in approximately une semaine so I don't really care about any of it.  Not my circus, not my monkeys (quaint old Polish expression).

Thursday, 25 September 2014

Biomass Baloney

I am not an expert on global warming...oops, strike that...climate change (apparently the globe hasn't actually warmed up that much in 20 years or more), but there was something on our local news the other night that caught my attention.  Apparently Drax Power Station near Selby, North Yorkshire is planning on being  biomass fuelled, instead of being coal fuelled.  Now this all sounds very ecologically friendly but the biomass material is made mainly from trees (from sustainable forests, so they say).  So for a huge power station burning fuel 24 hours a day, thousands of trees would have to be destroyed to fill up one 50,000 ton tanker with biomass pellets. Oh, did I mention that the biomass is shipped in from USA?  Is it just me or does this not make sense to you either?  The irony of it is that we used to have a good supply of coal from down the road in Doncaster.  I understand about Drax wanting to reduce their carbon footprint, whatever that actually means, but to destroy nature in the process just seems a bit strange to me.

Monday, 22 September 2014

From Darkness to Light

After all the hoo ha and angry bellowing from the shallow end of the gene pool in Glasgow the other night, I read about something wonderful that happened the next day.  Apparently a spontaneous outburst of generosity occurred during a peace rally in George Square.  Peace campaigners were talking about a food bank that they ran and soon after,  bags of food started arriving, donated by passers by. By the end of Saturday there were hundreds of bags of food and on Sunday there were even more.  The generosity of Glasgow people never fails to amaze me. This is the Glasgow that I know and love and the people, whose sarcasm could cut you to the quick and leave you lying in a quivering heap, but whose hearts are made of pure gold.
Bags of food delivered by generous passers-by in Glasgow's George Square

Saturday, 20 September 2014

The Dark Side of Glasgow

Clashes in George Square in Glasgow last night

I know my last post was entitled "I Predict a Riot" but I didn't really mean it.  Last night there were violent clashes between the NO and YES voters.  Well, actually the angry mob were shouting sectarian chants and insults and some were doing the Nazi saluting thing.  Some were so young that they wouldn't even know what any of it meant.  I have been away from Glasgow for too long.  I had almost forgotten about that deep rooted religious nonsense that made Glasgow a microcosm of Northern Ireland. It made people who supported one football team attack and beat up someone who supported another football team just because they were wearing the wrong colours (wrong colours = wrong religion). I hated all the Catholic/Protestant stuff when I was young and I have been reminded of it again now and I hate it even more. 
So sad to see the dark side of Glasgow being broadcast to the world.

Thursday, 18 September 2014

I Predict a Riot

Apologies in advance for any sweary words but I think they are an important part of the post and are not intended to cause offence.


ALEX SALMOND:  Whit!  They voted YES?  Jesus Christ! WTF are we going to do now Nicola? You're my right hand man, you think of something.

NICOLA STURGEON: How the fluff should I know what to do, you great fat chubber.  I've been telling the fooking media that we can keep the fooking pound.  I've said it that many times, I even convinced myself.  How do we explain to the Scottish people that we have to invent our own currency?  Their savings and pensions will become groats...or worse...Euros, for fluff sake.  
ALEX SALMOND: (head in hands).  That pillock, Cameron will turn the money taps off now and we'll be doomed.  I honestly thought they'd vote NO and we'd get more money sent up from England, like those three clowns promised.  I had planned on giving people on benefits a pay rise on the strength of that. Christ, I even had my "magnanimous in defeat" speech ready. 
ALEX SALMOND: Anyway, Nicola, we have to go out there and face the media now so stop greetin' and tidy up yer face for the cameras.
NICOLA STURGEON: I am NOT greeting Alex, I've just got something in my eye.  You sort out your own fat face.
A lackey enters the room: It's time for the Press Conference now. 
ALEX SALMOND:  Aye, we're ready. Let's go and face the Press Nicola. Happy face on now.
As they enter the Press Conference, there are loud cheers all round.  A smiling Alex Salmond and Nicola Sturgeon wave and shake hands with the supporters and eventually it quietens down, ready for the speeches. Alex Salmond shakes his jowls and begins....
ALEX SALMOND: What a magnificent day for Scotland!

Saturday, 13 September 2014

Yes or No? Do we Really Care?

...and tell our enemies that they may take our lives
but they will never take our FREEEEEEDOM!!

I happened to be earwigging overhear a conversation in our local Morrison's supermarket the other day.  The lady at the checkout had asked an elderly Scottish gentleman what he thought about Scottish Independence.  Big mistake!  Huge mistake!  The old b****d went off on one, complaining that he didn't get to vote because he lived in England and he had written to our local MP, David Davis, to ask him to do something about it.  The poor wee checkout lady looked a bit flummoxed by his outburst.  It transpired (I was still earwigging at this point) that this elderly Scottish gentleman was in his 70s and had lived in East Yorkshire since 1965.....almost 50 years.  I'll just leave that one with you.

The UK Government, in its wisdom, decided on a last ditch appeal to the "YES" voters.  What do you think they did?  Well, of course, they sent in the clowns, in the shape of Cameron, Cleggy and Miliband.  How to get the whole Scottish nation to vote YES in one easy lesson. F***wits!  Sorry, I have to swear sometimes.

When people hear my Scottish accent, they sometimes ask me what I think about Scottish Independence and I say to them "Quite frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."  Not my circus, not my monkeys (old Polish saying). I have lived in East Yorkshire for over 20 years and have been very happy here. I don't think I would want to move back to Scotland just because of the climate alone.  'Tis always very cold and wet in Glasgow.   I have never been into the Scottish-ness thing (I only know the first verse of Flower of Scotland - oh, shock horror!) and I hate all the "we hate the English" rabble of Scottish nationalists who have probably never been outside of Scotland, apart from their yearly holiday to Benidorm with a plane load of...well, other Scottish people.  In all the years I have lived in England, I have never ever come across any Scottish-hating English people.

So, we shall see what happens after the vote next week.  I suspect that if it is a YES vote, the conversation will go something like this:-

ALEX SALMOND: "Oh Shit, Nicola.  What the fluff do we do now?"

Sunday, 7 September 2014

Lancaster Bombers

Today we were lucky enough to witness the last two remaining Lancaster bombers flying past our area.  Yesterday we went over to Kirmington in Lincolnshire as they were due to fly over the airport there at lunchtime.  Unfortunately, due to bad weather at RAF Coningsby, they were unable to take off.  Apologies for the quality of the photos.  We only had a matter of a few minutes to take them and my zoom is not very zoomy.
The late great Beatrice Printemps (Roberto's mother) used to sit at her bedroom window when she was a wee lass and count the Lancasters as they went out on their missions.  She told us that she once counted 600 in one night.
Lancaster Bombers flying over Holme-on-Spalding-Moor, East Yorkshire
7 September 2014 at 9.23am